I Feel Great

Ben's Story ( I Feel Great )

Lap-banding/lapsurgery has changed my life in so many positive ways I cannot even begin to contemplate my life now without that tiny little band and all the things it unlocked for me.

Ben's Story

I like many people was overweight, no, very overweight and had tried to bring my weight down through just about every intervention you could think of. It's not that I don't have the willpower, I do, but the problem of rebounding after some success only threw me back into the mire.

I had been thinking of lap banding for some time but had dismissed it as way too invasive and thinking back on it now, almost like a cop out or a resignation that I could not get thinner/fitter/healthier. I avoided mirrors, I avoided cameras and photos more. I just didn't want to see myself and that should have been a big warning sign. If it is in your power to change your situation, you owe it to yourself to do it.

Then I had a child (not me personally, but my wife and I) and I KNEW that the time had come to get of my expanding ass and do something, anything, to ensure that the time I spent with my child would be healthy, happy and energetic.

Now that I had made a decision, a psychological weight fell from my shoulders (and soon my waist) and I further investigated the process and outcomes of lapband surgery and sought some personal anecdotes both good and bad to weigh up the pro's and con's in doing this. My decision was really cemented after the first couple of interviews and consultations with everyone at Lapsurgery. They were utterly professional, understanding of my situation, made sure that I was aware of everything that this process would involve and the risks and benefits of what I had chosen to do. They take you through a comprehensive investigation into what I needed to do to maximise my chances of success.

They helped guide me psychologically, physically and emotionally throughout. I decided that I wasn't going to tell anyone initially what I was doing. It was my decision, my wife was very supportive, and I didn't want the pressure from other people's pre-conceived notions of what weight loss should entail. I liked showing them the outcome though! After the psychological assessment and review, the meetings and consultations with the dietician, the pre-surgery consultations with my doctor and surgeon, who all explained the hard bits and the easier bits I was about to face, I was in a great place to begin my journey.

I won't lie; the lead up to surgery – the meal replacement shake period - was a tough two weeks. But I dropped a few kilos and felt better immediately. I was supported through this by the staff and doctors there, who had done it too, to see what it was like for their clients, told me how much they struggled and the admiration and support they offered at this time only strengthened my resolved to get this done. The surgery was not as bad as I thought, the pain wasn't too much, the discomfort wasn't too bad and I was back up and walking quite soon (much sooner than I thought) and was sent home to rest and get on with the next part of my life with a huge amount of info and support numbers and congratulations.
The next few weeks settling into my band were really alright. No, really, it wasn't terrible. The process is really well set out and detailed and the support groups really helped give me a sense that I was in the same boat as others and I was actually seeing some early results. Don't forget, the process isn't overnight – it is a change in the way you relate to food and your life. This change is physical as much as it is psychological and it is made easier by the band.

Have I mentioned I love my band? I do. It took away the sensations (consciously and unconsciously) of wanting to eat. I felt full for the first time in years without having to undo my top button. I didn't feel like eating all the time (non hungry eating) and I really hadn't changed my diet all that much. I was more aware of the need for really good things to go in as I wasn't eating so much, but that was another great by product – my diet got better because I didn't have enough room for bad stuff anymore.

The weight drops off, it really does. You go back to get a band fill or check if you notice portions going up or your weight plateauing. You go back because they support you, give you tips for when you relapse, when you need a kick in the pants to keep going, and lastly you go back because without that support and guidance you may not continue to lose weight and at this point after all the wins you have had, you want to get to an ideal weight and stay there. It isn't hard. You just eat – little bits and slowly, actually enjoying your food for the first time in ages, and then you feel full and stop. That's it. That is all it takes. Eat off a side plate (that's all you will need) and eat properly, EASY. Just like the "normal" people I so envied. I can't tell you what part of my nature or nurture brought me to be overweight, it was like a combination of things, BUT, the band makes the process of losing it easy, simple, unconscious and so rewarding.

The process is measured in kilos, but I found the centimetres were the best part. New clothes that actually fit, off the rack, anytime you wanted, that had some shape that anyone could buy, that everyone else wore. That was a huge moment for me. Shopping wasn't something I avoided as much as photos anymore. I am doing my wedding photos again with my wife – I have to take a huge amount of fabric in to fit into my suit – my wife wants to help me move on from the person I was, as I am not that person anymore, in a really good way.

It has been three years and I am not quite at my ideal weight, but hugely smaller, and I have plateaued a bit, but there is a constant trajectory down. As the weight goes down I have a sense of pride in myself that continues to grow. I spend as much time with my daughter and wife as I can. I swim with my daughter (I am still very white and that scares some people) and I am not afraid to do so. Another huge moment, getting on your swimming stuff!

I have one regret though – not doing it earlier. I want those years back. I want that time with my friends back. I want my enjoyment of life back. If you asked me at any point in this process if you should do it, at any point including just post-surgery, I would say yes. I would shout yes. The things you go through to get this band are absolutely inconsequential compared to the outcome. It is not a cop out, it is certainly not the easy way out, you should not feel bad about this decision – you are making a really tough decision to turn your life around. Tell people or don't – they don't have to know how you are doing it, but they WILL know you are losing weight. Do it for your own reasons, but do it. Start living.